Are you a first-time mentee and not sure where to begin? We’ve got you! It can feel both exciting and intimidating to start a mentorship relationship. These Do’s and Don’ts will help you set – and crush – those professional goals that have been sitting on the back burner. Read on for our tips for making the most of this time. 

1. Do respect your mentor's time. Ain’t nobody got time to wait around in the Zoom room! Being on time and sticking to a schedule is part of creating a respectful relationship. Be honest with yourself about what you need to be on time – for example, you know damn well the MTA is unpredictable, so leave a 30-minute buffer when meeting in person.

   
   

2. Don’t be afraid to ask questions. That’s what your mentor is there for! The more specificity, the better for both of you. Asking “What suggestions do you have for women of color in our field?” is a good start, but “Given my experience, what courses or certifications do you think would help me get to my next promotion?” would help you dig a little deeper.

   
   

3. Do your homework. This doesn’t just mean LinkedIn stalking your mentor. It also means doing the work your mentor suggests. Did your mentor suggest a book to read? Read it. Ask you to do a goal exercise. Do it before your next meeting! No one’s grading you on this. You need to reframe putting in the work as a way to benefit you rather than a chore.

4. Do set clear boundaries. Chill with the double texting. While your mentor is there to help you, they’re booked and busy. This goes back to respecting your mentor’s time. Have a conversation early on about how (phone call, email, text?) and when (no calls after 7 pm) they would like to be contacted. If you create communication expectations, the relationship is bound to go more smoothly. Be upfront with your mentor about your boundaries too – if you know you’re not gonna make an 8 am meeting after your night shift, just be honest and find a compromise.

5. Do take the lead. Take the initiative and suggest a meeting with your mentor or ask for that introduction to someone in their network. Your mentor will appreciate you being direct about how they can best support you. As mama always said, if you don’t ask, the answer will always be no.  

6. Do be open to feedback. Truth does be hurting sometimes, but take your mentor’s suggestions in good faith. You are by no means obligated to take their advice, but being open to constructive criticism will help you grow as a person. 

7. Don’t limit yourself. As our good sis, Elphaba said in Wicked, the future is unlimited. Don’t be afraid of saying your biggest dreams aloud on this journey. Your mentor is there to help you shatter ceilings and open doors.

8. Do treat yourself kindly. Like elsewhere in life, you’re going to come up against walls and make mistakes. No need to beat yourself up. Just keep going. We know you’ve got this.

We hope you enjoy your time with your mentor and build a wonderful relationship. One last do? Have fun! 

Written by: Krista White

Edited by: Shaunah Margaret